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Old 02-22-10, 07:19 PM   #1
Osprey
 
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Default Trust, as in Trust Department

Thank you Legs and Baja Gringo. I'm please you tolerate me. To say thanks and to stay in a safe (under the circumstances) safe zone I offer yet another little piece I hope you will enjoy.

Trust, as in Trust Department


They call me “The Paper Nanny” because I really don’t manage going businesses. I handle things for old, rich widows and widowers. If they have personal secretaries I take over where they leave off. In that case I just do the heavy lifting. When and if they do not employ a secretary I offer a full range of services. I don’t do stocks, trading – that’s for professional portfolio managers. Some of my clients simply let their bank trust departments handle their portfolios. One such client, Gloria Fulton Nealy, I call her The Little Princess, called me four days ago to set up today’s meeting with the head of the Trust Department of Bank United, Florida’s largest bank. The meeting was held at the Palm Beach Main Bank Trust Department and was attended by me, attorney Cecil Childers of Childers and Associates, Professional Management Services of West Palm Beach, Mrs. Nealy, Calvin Arpee, Regional V.P. and head of the Trust Department, his assistant, Wayne Flagg.

With the market the way it is, wealthy people have more to lose than the poor folks so one would expect they would be looking to everyone and anyone for answers to their questions about portfolio options. So this is the sixth such meeting I’ve attended with stock managers since November – two have been phone conferences and one was oovoo.

Usually the bigger the bank, the more elaborate the board rooms and that is surely true of Bank United. Gayle Nealy, Gloria’s fruit juice mogul husband, now long dead, was once on the board of a bank gobbled up by Bank United and you would think that would put her account in special banking favor heaven but I have learned that gobblers are not very friendly with the relatives of those gobbled. It would be unprofessional of me to suggest her affairs might have been better handled by people she and her family had never met nor corresponded with.

I rarely have enough involvement in trust matters to have meaningful input at these gatherings of eagles. In the industry they would be called “Come to Jesus” meetings so in this case perhaps the clients see my role as a Jehovah’s Witness. Like a good witness I will tell you about the meeting.

The room, the desk, the setting were all very elaborate and obviously designed by the set director of The Wizard of Oz. I take that license because Calvin was a little dweeb of a man behind a desk no container ship sky crane could heft. I think I might have done it the other way around, make the desk small and without notice, the man gets bigger, more, how shall I say, human. Flagg was strategically seated behind and to the left of Arpee in a small but expensive chair like a tiny cay near a large and important island Kingdom.

I’m a member of the Florida bar but I don’t even put the word Attorney on my cards because people hate attorneys. So unless Arpee or Flagg were attorneys I was the only one in the room. That little factoid did not escape the notice of the princess.


There was a little awkward moment as we walked toward the big desk, the two men. Arpee stood and began to circumnavigate the desk to greet his trust client, smile, I suppose and try to shake her hand. None of that happened. She sat down and with the slightest motion of her hand rebuffed his physical, if lateral advance.

She said “Let’s begin. You know I’m Gloria Nealy. This is Cecil Childers. I’m here to find out about my trust money. Don’t you want to have an attorney present?”

“I’m Calvin Arpee, Mrs. Nealy. We’ve spoken on the phone a time or two. I didn’t call our legal department in because you didn’t say anything about the meeting being about legal matters. If you want one, I’m sure Mr. Flagg can have one here in just minutes.”

“Well, it’s your call Mr. Arpee. I just assumed that since almost all of my money is gone and since it was all in trust here, in this bank that you might want to have one to guide us through the original trust agreement that Gayle and I signed so many years ago. I have, amend that, I used to have enough money that I could have people to deal with my banks but, no thanks to you, all that has changed. Sad, that had this happened when I was younger, I could have handled it every bit as well as Gayle while now that I’m just two months from my 80th birthday I’ll be a little slow on the uptake. God and Mr. Childers will do just fine as witnesses today and if you are well versed in the contents of the agreement you and I can go through it. I have the whole afternoon.”

Mr. Arpee said “Mrs. Nealy, I went through your file this morning and I can assure you the trust agreement is, in every way, our standard agreement used for decades by our branches everywhere. It has been tested in the courts and the court of public opinion by way of our performance. In the main it is a template explaining our various responsibilities and duties. The contract is replete with the kinds of hold-harmless clauses and proper disclaimers so as not to leave any doubt about the rights and duties of all parties to it……”

“Mr. Arpee, I read the Sun-Sentinel newspaper arts, leisure and living section. I do not watch the tube. My secretary throws away all the junk mail, including your newsletter, so I won’t have to see it. I’m not a fool nor am I a hermit. I know what’s going on with Wall Street so we can cut through all that but I want to know what you thought your responsibilities have been to me, if you fulfilled any of them. I would also like to go through the current portfolio and get a value on each holding as of this very minute.”

Flagg laid the folders out on the big desk in neat stacks: stocks, bonds and annuities, money market accounts and certified gold purchase certificates of deposit. On top he placed the original Trust Agreement between the Nealys and Commerce Bank of Broward County. I won’t bore you with the process they followed going through the files except to say that after one and a half hours it was clear the holdings were the prototypical trust plan in place for those whose purpose is to conserve, and when and if possible, increase the artifacts of wealth and status while taking as little risk as possible.

Through it all I got the feeling that before we would leave the room, this delicate little clear thinker would demand an explanation of the risk-reward concept from these two empty suits whom she views as nothing grander than arrogant bean counters. A couple of times they almost touched the tender, sore spot when she might have taken a break to ask Arpee how they could sit by doing nothing except sending out the same old tired “Hold The Line” advice in the newsletter when they should have been pounding on their trust clients’ doors.

“I’m familiar with the DJIA top thirty. They used to be called Blue Chip Stocks. Now I believe they call them Blue Cheap Stocks. Looking at today’s board they are now worthless scraps of paper; painful little reminders that your poor advice about Holding the Line has wiped us out. How do these companies fare now? How did they make a profit in the past? What happened? How come a giant bank like this couldn’t see it coming? Don’t you make thousands of home loans? Can you say Toxic?

Well, gentlemen, looks like we’re all in the same boat. We’ll have to take the Kool Aid together – either that or go begging. You to all the U.S. taxpayers through the bailout, me to my family and friends. Well, I’ve got my own bailout. Some time ago, I won’t say how long but it was shortly after Gayle’s death, I began a special savings plan of my own. It does not involve banks or banking, stocks, money market or gold. It is private, adequate and it will provide quite sufficiently.

While I’m enjoying my few remaining years in fairly good health I’ll have some lively theater. I’ll watch you and the others squirm and beg at the trough. Watch while you close branch after branch, hold auctions to sell your tangibles.

Before I go, and on the same subject, I love this desk. How much? Can you hold it for me, keep it out of the auction somehow? Maybe put a sticker on it with my phone number before it goes to storage. Just a thought.

Come on Cecil. We are through here.”
Old 02-22-10, 08:30 PM   #2
Marty Cortez
 
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Default Re: Thank you, thank you.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Osprey
...your poor advice about Holding the Line has wiped us out...How come a giant bank like this couldn’t see it coming?...
That was wonderful; thank you very much.
Old 02-22-10, 09:55 PM   #3
longlegsinlapaz
 
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Default Re: Trust Department

Quote:
Originally Posted by Marty Cortez
You're saying that as if the two were mutually exclusive.
We have only the finest topics off-topic here.
Well, yeah, as a matter of fact, I DID think something along those lines!

Quote:
Originally Posted by bajagringo
Isn't that where I moved this???

Hmmmmm....ya know, I NEVER THINK to LOOK at which forum things are posted in, especially when I enjoy them! Possibly I'll have try to remember to start thinking about trying to think about looking before I post hastily in the future....maybe!
Old 02-23-10, 08:33 AM   #4
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Default Re: Trust Department

Funny, I also never look at what "category" something is in... really doesn't make much difference.. to me.. but, then.... I'm, well.......

I will leave that to your own imagination.. its more fun..
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